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What we forget…

What we forget.... by Keri Kettle

I recently went to visit one of my grandmothers at the small nursing home where she is being cared for beautifully. She has physical problems and also severe dementia, the combination of which means she needs 24 hour skilled nursing care. Her memory is so damaged that she doesn’t even recognize the caregivers that are there with her every day. When I went to see her, she confided to me, “[t]here are a lot of grandmas here, but we’re having a good time.”

One thing she remembers is that she spent much of her life working. As a single mom, she did incredibly well providing for my dad and uncle. She was always happy to see us grandkids but she was also usually coming or going from one work obligation to another. As a successful real estate agent, there was no going home and being done with your work day at 5 o’clock.

During my visit with her at the nursing home, she didn’t remember who I am or even where she was. When I asked her a question, she said a few times, “oh, I don’t remember, I was probably working.” As proud as I am of how hard my grandmother worked and that she was able to keep herself and her kids not just out of poverty but financially secure and comfortably middle class – at a time when being a single mother almost always meant being poor- I do hope that I remember more about my life than that I worked a lot. My grandmother may not have had many choices other than working her tail off, but I do. And you probably do, too.

What do you want to remember at the end of your life? The choices we make each day shape the pattern of our days and create the story that we will remember and be remembered by. We won’t remember what we hoped to choose, we will remember what we actually did. When you fill your days with pleasure, you are creating happy memories.

Now excuse me while I go do some yoga – because in addition to wanting to fill my memory with pleasure, I’m also hoping to have some flexibility left in my joints in my eighties.

Why you are like a cat when you are upset…

Why you are like a cat when you are upset... by Keri Kettle

I had to take my cat in for surgery today. Which meant that he couldn’t eat after midnight last night. He was truly pissed this morning before we left for the vet. He kept running to the bowl and crying and running back to me and crying some more. The entire time that I was […]

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Three Things Every Busy Mom Needs to Know to Survive The Holidays

Three Things Every Busy Mom Needs to Know to Survive The Holidays by Keri Kettle

This week, instead of reading my words you get to see me talk – woohoo! – in my webinar, “Three Things Every Busy Mom Needs to Know to Survive the Holidays Without Losing Her Nut”. It’s catchy, right?  I tried to make it longer, but I ran out of vowels.

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Why comparing my life to my Facebook friends makes me happy…

Why comparing my life to my Facebook friends makes me happy… by Keri Kettle

Negative emotions like loneliness, envy, and guilt have an important role to play in a happy life; they’re big, flashing signs that something needs to change.  – Gretchen Rubin I read on Facebook that Glennon Doyle (of Momastery) finishes all her holiday shopping by the end of November so that she can just enjoy spending […]

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The Holiday I’m Choosing…

The Holiday I'm Choosing... by Keri Kettle

I read this quote and gave a little fist pump of “yes!”: As the keepers of sacred rituals and traditions women have the right to create new ones. How about that? How about your holiday season being a time for peace, comfort, love and healing? If we all chose this kind of holiday the world […]

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