How to let go…

My oldest is getting ready to head off to study overseas for a gap year (a gap year is taking a year off between finishing high school and going to college).  It is certainly a challenge not to worry if she will get up on time, if she will eat right, if she will make […]

Seriously, stop touching me…

I spent eleven hours sitting on a plane between my two kids.  Eleven is supposed to be a magical number.  This was not a magical experience.  Or maybe it was. My kids are teenagers, they give hugs, but not unless I initiate, and they are the first to push away.  They are nearly adults, but […]

How I know it’s okay to stop making your kids eat kale…

Can we let ourselves off the “good mom/bad mom” hook?  Can we trust that we can be really good moms without wearing ourselves out – running through our day and then falling into bed exhausted and burnt out every night?  Can we believe that it’s safe to not spend every moment trying to ward off […]

When your kid isn’t like the other kids…

When the prom pictures and the graduation photos start showing up on FaceBook, I get a little twinge in my stomach.  My girl won’t be going to prom.  She could go to the high school graduation at her independent study high school program but she won’t.  I am still trying to talk her in to […]

One day it just happens….

For years my kids were not friends.  My daughter’s standard line was, “my little brother ruined my life.” I remember the short drive from school to our house, a maximum of fifteen minutes if we caught every red light, as a poking, whining, screaming descent in to hell every, freaking day.  Why couldn’t they just […]

Bringing back the 70’s summer…

This was taken in Mazatlán, Mexico around 1976 when I was about 5.  We used to camp on the beach here in the summer because my mom was a teacher and it was cheaper to live in Mexico while she was off work for the summer.  We had no television or phone, handheld electronics didn’t […]

How to find your kindreds…

I have often told new moms that the best way to find other parents who might be your friends is to make an inappropriate joke about drinking while parenting, and see who laughs.  If you crack a joke about slipping some rum in your coffee at the playground and the mom next to you raises […]

What the parenting books don’t tell you…

Before the baby comes you read Spock or Brazelton or What To Be Terrified of When You Are Expecting… There were moments when my teen was a toddler and her tantrums seemed like they would never end, I would sit outside her bedroom door and read Becky Bailey’s There Has To Be A Better Way. […]

My best parenting tip…

My friend told her daughter that if she thinks one of her parenting rules is dumb, she wants her daughter to tell her why. She told her, “I’ve only been a parent of a 14-year-old girl since you turned 14, if something’s not working and you have a better idea – speak up!” My favorite parenting method […]

The secret to getting enough alone time…

Most women need some time alone.  Some of us (like me) need a LOT of time alone.  I’m not an introvert but I definitely need quiet time, completely by myself, in order to avoid being cranky and pissy. The thing is that it is a very rare day that your partner or your kids say […]