The gift of not giving a sh*t

The gift of not giving a sh*t by Keri Kettle

Photo credit: Stacy de la Rosa

There’s a silver lining to the grief of losing a marriage or going through a major health crisis or a disaster of one sort or another, but it’s not something people talk about often.  Most people aren’t really up for hearing the “bright side” of divorce or cancer or the death of someone you love.  But after the dust settles and the legal paperwork has been filed away and the wounds have scarred over – there is a gift.

When you’ve been through hard stuff, you get the gift of not giving a shit what other people think about you.

Once the world has watched you unravel, you know that there is no point in trying to be the perfect wife, mother or daughter.  If you can’t be the person you were supposed to be – why not be who YOU want to be.

Not everyone is willing to accept this gift.  Some of us go another way, taking up the baggage of the victim and choosing to live their life as a martyr to what happened to them.

I choose to define my own happily ever after.  I choose pleasure, even when it makes other people think I’m crazy or selfish or a bad mother/wife/______ (fill in the blank with your label of choice).  I hope you will accept the gift of not giving a shit.

I hope you put your ice cream, chips and wine on the grocery store conveyor belt without shame.  I hope you eat your kale quinoa coconut bowl in front of your co-workers or cousins, even if they make fun of your “hippie food”.  I hope you show up in yoga class even if you tooted while you Downward Dog’d last week.

I hope you embrace the gift, pull on your boots and stomp off to make your own path.  I will be right there next to you.


  1. Just arrived there on Monday. I hope its not too late!

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